Families are under pressure. Across our nation, grandparents are raising grandchildren while financial strain, broken relationships, addiction, violence and busy lives weigh on our homes. These challenges are real, but they aren’t the final word. God hasn’t given up on the family. He is the God of the family, and He loves your family.
This Sunday, Ps Larry continued our GOing Deeper series with a message about families that remember the Lord. In a video teaching by Arch and Busi Bilankulu, they invited their children to join them and showed us what family cell looks like in their home . Afterwards, Ps Larry applied the message to our families, friendships and church community.
Ephesians 6 Starts With Family
Many believers know Ephesians 6:10–18 as the passage about the armour of God. It teaches us to be strong in the Lord, remain connected to Jesus and understand spiritual warfare. Ps Larry drew our attention to something we can easily miss: Ephesians 6 doesn’t begin at verse 10.
It begins with family.
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right … And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.” — Ephesians 6:1–4 (NKJV)
Before Paul speaks about standing against the enemy, he speaks about relationships between children and parents. No family is perfect, and some carry deep wounds, but Christ can bring healing and order. God gives us a spiritual family within the church too—a community where people can belong, grow and follow Jesus.
Our Homes Are Training Grounds, Not Battle Zones
“Blessed be the Lord my Rock, who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle.” — Psalm 144:1 (NKJV)
Arch and Busi used this verse to describe the purpose of a godly home: our homes should be training grounds, not battle zones.
The enemy wants us to turn on one another. When a spouse, parent, child or sibling starts to look like the enemy, we’ve lost sight of the real battle. Your family is one team. That doesn’t mean avoiding conflict or pretending everything is fine. Burying problems won’t help a family thrive.
A training ground is a place for honest conversations, spoken with grace. It’s where forgiveness becomes part of the family culture and where people learn to work through tension without tearing one another down.
“And if a house is divided against itself, that house cannot stand.” — Mark 3:25 (NKJV)
God uses that unity to prepare us for the battles beyond our walls.
Faith Is Taught in Everyday Moments
Discipleship at home doesn’t happen only during a formal Bible study. It happens in the car, around the dinner table, before bed and in the way we respond to ordinary frustrations.
“Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.” — Deuteronomy 6:6–7 (NLT)
Arch and Busi asked some searching questions. What do our children hear when we’re driving? What do they hear when we’re watching Bafana Bafana, talking about the president or responding to bad news? We teach through instruction, but we teach just as powerfully through our reactions.
Parents can use everyday situations to hear how their children think. Ask how they’d respond if somebody said God wasn’t real, or what they’d do if another child took their lunch. These conversations prepare them for a culture that doesn’t honour God.
There’s always something to teach, and parents can learn from their children too. The goal isn’t mere compliance with household rules. We’re teaching children to recognise God’s voice and respond when He speaks.
What Family Cell Looks Like in Real Life
When the Bilankulu children joined their parents, the teaching became wonderfully practical. They spoke about their personal devotional lives, what they thank God for and even how missing time with God affects their mood and the way they treat others.
Their demonstration wasn’t polished or rehearsed—and that was part of its value. Family cell doesn’t need to look perfect. Young children interrupt, siblings don’t always have an answer, and some weeks are easier than others. Make room for God and patiently return everyone’s attention to Him.
A family cell can include:
- Thanksgiving: Give everyone time to share something they’re grateful for without interruption.
- Scripture: Read a short passage and involve the whole family in discussing it.
- Forgiveness and repentance: Create a safe place to admit where you missed the mark, ask forgiveness and release offences.
- Communion: Remember the sacrifice of Jesus together.
- Prayer: Pray simply and specifically for restoration and the needs of the family.
- Declarations: Speak God’s Word and promises over your home.
As Busi explained, “Our families are only as strong as our ability to get to Jesus.” Family cell brings everyone back to the foot of the cross.
Start With the Family God Has Given You
After the video, Ps Larry reminded us that we must apply the message to our own season of life. He and Ps Mandy no longer have children living at home, but that doesn’t remove the need to put God at the centre of their household. Parents with adult children in other cities or countries can meet on Zoom, share a Scripture and pray together—even if it’s only for 15 minutes once a month.
Friends who play golf together can pray before the round or talk honestly over breakfast. A church cell should feel like family: a place where people can share their lives within the boundaries of God’s Word. Family cell isn’t a rigid format reserved for one type of household.
“But as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” — Joshua 24:15 (NKJV)
Make a decision, choose a realistic time and place it in the diary. Use the same day where possible, turn off distracting devices and expect resistance. Tiredness, deadlines and children’s moods will compete for that time. Persist in love. You don’t have to do all six parts in the first week. Start simply and grow from there.
Pursue Peace and God’s Presence
Ps Larry closed by bringing us back to peace.
“Keep turning your back on every sin, and make ‘peace’ your life motto. Practise being at peace with everyone.” — Psalm 34:14 (TPT)
Peace isn’t merely the absence of an argument. God’s shalom brings order, wholeness and the freedom to hear the Holy Spirit clearly. We can chase the things of God while neglecting His presence. Like the fan Ps Larry used in an earlier illustration, it can’t do its work unless it’s plugged into the source.
We can attend church, serve and do many good things, but we need daily time with God. Lasting victory doesn’t come from a formula. It flows from His presence and peace. We can’t change our spouse, children or circumstances through our own strength, but when we pursue God’s peace, He changes the atmosphere within us and around us.
God wants our homes to be filled with joy. Psalm 144:12–15 pictures sons flourishing like well-nurtured plants, daughters standing like graceful pillars, provision filling the barns and protection surrounding the community. Even when a family is facing a difficult season, keeping God at the centre brings strength for the battles within and beyond the home.
If your family needs prayer or you’d like help getting connected at 3C South Coast, please contact us. We’d love to stand with you.
Receive God’s grace to rebuild the altar in your home and declare with faith: As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
Prayer
Father, thank You for our families and for the spiritual family You’ve given us.
Forgive us for the excuses we’ve made and for allowing distraction, division or unforgiveness into our homes. Give us grace to put You first again. Teach us to speak words that build, to forgive quickly and to make time for Your Word and prayer. May our homes become training grounds for righteousness, filled with Your presence, peace and joy. Strengthen our children to know You and walk in Your ways. As for us and our households, we will serve the Lord.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen.
